This is what matters in the first message of your match

Tips: How can I sign up for my Tinder match?

Now that we’ve covered the basics of cover letters for Tinder and Co. together, let’s get down to the details. What exactly can I write? How to approach the first message? And how do I get him to answer me too?

Enter photos

The first thing you see in a man or woman when dating online on Tinder and Co. is them profile pictures. They dictate first impressions and largely dictate whether you swipe left or right. Pictures of your match are like that too the perfect tip for your first message when writing a match.

But even if the photos are usually only superficial: don’t stick to the surface, but search for photo tips that pique your interest. Have you photographed your hobby that you’ve always wanted to try? Does he have a vacation photo of where you’ve been before? Is he or she sitting in the picture at your favorite bar? I can do it all good conversation starter and signal the other person that you have looked closely at their profile. It also shows you similarities you have and that you interest want to know more about it.

Write something about your profile text

Also profile text on Tinder a woman or a man could be the starting point for your first message. If the photos don’t show too much, so can you Look for aspects in the text that you can understand. Is he or she from a city you’ve been to before? Has he or she announced an exciting job? Did he mention hobbies and interests that you can relate to? Are there any of your favorite artists among his favorite songs?

Find one aspect of the profile that you particularly like. Then you have two main options:

  1. You put similarities and explain your personal connection to some aspect of his profile.
  2. You take some aspect of his profile as the start of the conversation and publish it specific question down.

If you are lucky, you may have also written some text that is suitable for solving this problem. The person may even have asked a question in their profile text that you can answer.

Be creative

Is there a reference in the profile that you can refer to? Or you just like to do your own thing and be creative. Then you can do it. For example, you can ask your match a fun question. Especially Either-or-questions or-you-prefer-to-ask can be a creative icebreaker. The good thing: you’ll learn more about it right away, and there’s a very good chance that your counterpart will also ask you a fun and creative question. Maybe the icebreaker would be the perfect topic for a deeper conversation.

Write to Tinder: examples and templates

Do you need more details? So read it here examples and templates by. Maybe there’s the right icebreaker for you for the first message.

  • hey xy i like your tattoo. I have a very similar one on my forearm. Do you only have one or more?
  • hi xy how cool that you also like ice skating. I also have a board. Where is your favorite ice skating spot?
  • good morning xy I really have to say: I like your dress style. The cap in the third photo looks really good on you.
  • hey xy tell me are you in ireland in that one photo? I’ve always wanted to go there. What was the highlight of your trip?
  • hi xy You wrote that you like to read. What was the last book you read?
  • good morning xy Finally someone who also likes to listen to techno. Were you also at the Fusion Festival this year?
  • hey xy I see you like to eat out. If you could only eat one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?
  • hi xy tell me: truth or dare?
  • good morning xy Fancy a deep question? Do you prefer to have a pause button or a rewind button in your life?

First message on Tinder: And then?

Now you did it! You took the initiative and sent your first message. I’m proud of you. Wasn’t that hard, right? What comes next is no longer in your hands. You did your best and thought carefully about the message for your cover letter, rather than formulating an average text. Now there are two possible outcomes: Your match suits you or not.

  1. You won’t get an answer: If your match doesn’t respond despite your creative message, don’t be sad. Often times, matches are already writing with many other men or women, are rarely active or not at all interested in real conversations, but just want to strengthen their ego with matches. But it could also be that they just aren’t on your wavelength. Then, unfortunately, it is so. But in the end you will save a lot of time and effort.
  2. You will get a reply: Yes! Your match responded and the icebreaker was successful. Now just let the conversation drift and see where it leads. It is important that you are not the only one asking questions. Texting should be give and take. You ask him something and you learn something about the other person, and he also asks you questions so that you can reveal something about yourself. If you like each other, don’t wait too long to meet in real life. Only then can you determine if it really fits.

Conclusion: dare and be creative!

When I think back to my beginnings with online dating on Tinder and Co., I was very insecure at the time. I didn’t dare to write the match and always hoped he would take the initiative. Today I am making a cover letter.

My conclusion: It is incredibly well received by many men when a woman sends her first message and thus signaled an interest. While I used to let silence slip through my fingers of one or the other great grip, today I leave nothing to fate (or to men 😄). I found out that my personal and creative first messages come very well in most matches and as a result I have very good response rate.

Hope I was able to help with my online dating tips on Tinder and Co. We lonely ladies must support each other. Now have fun sliding!

Also interesting:

First Date Ideas: 20 suggestions for every season

Tinder Bio: Do’s and Don’ts

Kiss on the first date: yes or no? And the best tips

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